Whether at the cemetery during a funeral or in the weeks following, it’s often difficult to know what to say or do when someone has just lost a loved one. Many of us have been in this position. We want to help, but we’re just not sure how.
Of course, it can all depend on how well you know someone or if they are willing to open up to you. But, in our experience at Mountain View Funeral Home and Cemetery, we know that any showing of support can help to comfort a person who is grieving. It can be as simple as a smile or a hug. Or, maybe you could arrange for a couple of weeks’ worth of meals. Most people who are grieving really do appreciate any form of kindness.
One of the hardest things for mourners, though, is the time that passes following the cemetery burial or memorial service. It is true that there can be an outpouring of support immediately after someone dies, but the weeks and months that follow tend to be the hardest. The cemetery funeral is over. The cards of sympathy have stopped coming. People have gone on with their lives. That is when reality sinks in that a loved one is no longer there. There can be an incredible void or emptiness.
While it is true that life goes on, the life of someone who recently lost a loved one can look very different. It can take some time to adjust. It is during this time that people need love and support, more than ever.
So, what can you do? What can you say? Usually, the kindest gesture is to just be there. Show that you care. Listen if they want to talk. Hold their hand. Take them out for ice cream. It may have been a while since they’ve been out of the house. Any way that you can let them know you’re there for them can make a difference. Just think about how you would feel in their shoes. Empathy and kindness are usually the best ways to provide support.